Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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