yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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