please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
