Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
false alarm, still single
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