You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
