Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I checked into jail on foursquare
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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