Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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