At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
