bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
handjob tips. give me some.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
