Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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