i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
