D3 body, D1 cock
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
How external is "for external use only"?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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