Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize