You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize