When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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