Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
