i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
