I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
The power of my boobs compel you
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
