So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize