I'm drive I can fine osifer
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Can I color on your dick again?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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