i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
So apparently I’m into choking now
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
