I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize