I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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