Sacagawea was the original milf.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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