So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
