Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize