i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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