They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Randomize
