he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
