It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
