I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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