Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I want to fling myself into the sun
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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