Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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