I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Randomize
