I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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