So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
