Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Panties = found
Randomize
