3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize