someone get that fucking seahorse.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
You took a bar mat shot.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize