She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
