in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
