I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
