Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
