I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize