Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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