Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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