Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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