i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
She just used a chaser for red wine.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
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