its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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