no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
