Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
