i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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